Before. During. And After.3/21/2020 I had to write or type something, but I don’t even know how to do this right now. There’s a lot of stuff going on and it’s changing daily. It’s a strange, crazy time in our history right now, and we will be changed people because of it. Also? If I hear the words, “fluid situation,” “monitoring its progression,” or “social distancing” one more time, I may just hurt someone. Necessary to be spoken and written, to be sure. But, doesn’t change the fact that I’m sick of it and just want to curtail this madness so that we can begin the long road of recovery. Strange times, indeed.
Before COVID-19: My kids were in college and highschool. Homework was done. They walked to the stores and McDonald’s with friends and hung out as late as I’d let them. They helped with chores. And wanted their turns borrowing the car. I went to work every day where I enjoyed my job as a Marketing Coordinator for a large law firm. I got to write, work on website design, coordinate events and assist with presentations. I love my work family, and my old team that we lovingly refer to as the “Rock Room” are some amazing women and great friends. I went to the gym nearly every day after work, and on the weekends. I cooked most nights, and we’d order carry out usually once a week. During COVID-19: My kids are now at home, doing online education. My daughter had to pack up and move out of the dorms. Concerts, performances, school musicals, dances, and countless other things have been canceled. Homework is still done daily. They walk to the park or ride their bike around the neighborhood. They text and facetime their friends as late as I let them. They help with chores, even more so now. They don’t borrow the car now, because I don’t really let them go anywhere except a very rare trip through the drive-thru for ice cream. I no longer go into work every day, as pursuant to the Governor's order, my firm has had to temporarily close the office, with only attorneys and a small staff working remotely from home. I no longer get to do the job I enjoy so much, and quite frankly it’s left me a bit lost. I do, however, have more time to write for myself, read, draw, paint, and get all those projects I’ve been meaning to do done around my house. I still love my work family, and I especially love the women from the Rock Room, who, in these strange times, have definitely been rocks for me. I can’t go to the gym anymore since it’s closed, but I have gone for long walks and runs around the neighborhood. I still cook every night, but ordering carryout will now be a luxury, since my income just took a drastic hit. I now have extra canned goods and dry goods on hand, “just in case.” But a plus? I think I’ve washed every bit of dirty laundry in the house, and I even washed my bedding and get to sleep on clean sheets tonight! (Which, for the records, is one of life’s greatest little pleasures.) After COVID-19: Who knows? I know my kids will be kinder and more appreciative of things. I know their brains and bodies were pushed during the pandemic, even in the midst of upheaval. I hope I can return to work and be even better at my job than before, with a newfound appreciation for doing what I love. I know I will try to save more, and enjoy the company of those I love more. I’m looking forward to seeing my favorite people in the flesh and hugging them tight... all those little things we take for granted. Perhaps this was the universe’s way of pushing the reset button on us. Has this stupid virus turned our world upside down? Yes. Has it completely ruined our lives? No. Not really. Not yet. And we have the power to alter its course. I don’t care what social status you’re from. I don’t care what job you have. Or don’t have. I don’t care if you are a student. Or a teacher. Or a professional. What I care about is the health of humanity. Not the nation. Not my country. Humanity. We should want to continue. There’s a lot of stuff in today’s world that pushes against us. So I’m asking you to push back. Just do the right thing. You know in your heart what it is. I’m not going to bring up politics, or religion, or anything else. Because in the end, it’s not about that. It’s about being kind, compassionate, and doing the right thing for the person next to you. For the person across from you. For the person you might not even know. Stay home. Stay away from people. Push your reset button. Follow the guidelines. Take the very best care of your health and those around you and we will get through this OK. Stop panicking. Stop freaking out. Just do the right thing. There will be life after COVID-19. I’m sure in some ways it will be drastically different. And, in others, it will be very much the same. Let’s just all try to get there in one piece and not kill anyone along the way. Hmmm? Now go do the right thing. And don’t forget to wash your hands.
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During My Time Away.2/15/2020 For personal reasons, I am on a necessary break from social media. But, that doesn’t mean I took a break from life. Things have been weird and sometimes rough, but also busy. As some of you may know, I’m a marketing coordinator by day, and a single mother of 3 teens, and an author and artist, by night. Needless to say, life can get pretty hectic at times. Here’s what’s been going on lately though: My daughter, Grace, auditioned for, and got 2 parts in her high school musical production of Annie! The rehearsal schedule has been brutal, but she’s been on top of her school work and still manages to binge watch some Gilmore Girls with her momma. (Smiles.) I love couch time with my girlie! And - bragging moment - she was accepted into the Honors College at EMU! Hooray! My son, Adrian, joined two extracurricular music groups. First, the Video Game Orchestra, which is a student-run group learning the scores of famous video games. I’m totally looking forward to that fun concert in the spring. He also recently decided to join the Pit Orchestra for the musical. So, TWO of my babies will be performing. (And yes, this mom has already purchased tickets for 2 of the 4 days of performances in March.) I still manage to sneak in an episode of Green Arrow or the Flash with him and every so often we game together on his Switch. (Darn that Rainbow course on MarioKart!) And, the kid gives his momma THE BEST HUGS every day when I get home. I don’t know how I could’ve survived the last few weeks without them. My oldest, Jane, made the decision to join Alpha Sigma Tau sorority at EMU and is super excited about this new chapter in her college career. And, she's applying to the nursing program at the end of this semester! (Eeep!) It’s been fun having conversations with her about the new things she’s trying and I’m so proud of the young woman she is becoming. Amidst all of this, I also released my 8th novel, “Revealing Hope,” in e-book format and am currently working on getting the paperback formatted, proofed, and available for purchase. It’s a “process.” (Blarg.) I’ll be planning a few book signings in the near future. Thankfully, the early reviews that have trickled in have been great, and it seems readers are happy and love the plot twists I threw at them. I swear, I don’t know where some of these ideas came from, but I love those moments as a writer when I get to surprise even myself with exciting story ideas. Additionally, I dusted off the pencils and treated myself to a few new sketch pads to crank out some new drawings. I’m excited to go to the DIA (Detroit Institute of Art Museum) today as seeing the masters up close and personal is always inspiring to me. And, I’m looking forward to celebrating my mom’s 79th birthday with family this weekend, too. It’s always a fun circus when all of us Kachnowskis get together. (Quick, pass the bourbon before it’s gone!) Lastly, toss in some meandering around with words for (maybe) my next writing project, and hitting the gym nearly every day so that my sanity stays intact. Mostly. Other rambling things of note: I also managed to score some REALLY good bourbons (although I haven't cracked them open yet) and am hoping to book a tour at a cool Detroit distillery soon. (Where are all my drinking buddies!?) Oh, and I’m kind of obsessed with Eminem’s new song, “Godzilla.” Dude. Check it out at 2:56. (Link below) Holy moly. This song speaks to the inner gangsta in me. (Haha. If you know me, you’d realize why this is so absurd and hysterical.) Most recently, I’ve been commissioned to paint a very large piece. It’s intimidating, but I’m up for the challenge. I’m going to pull my daughter, Jane, in to assist, so it should be a fun mother-daughter project in the near future. Drawing and writing have always been very therapeutic for me so I’m thankful for both. Recently, I wrote a very personal blog post that I may share one day, but for now, this is all I can give you. Taking a lesson from my recent book, I do hope to return to social media soon. “Have courage and be kind.”
- Cinderella P.S. Help feed an author and don’t forget to download my newest books. I even have some audio versions available for those who are more of the podcast-type (and don’t forget to post reviews! *cough*) Thank you so much for your continued support, and, please stay tuned for book signing dates and future blogs! Click here to see my amazon author page: https://amzn.to/2UHxkQl The End Is Near.1/15/2020 As some of you may know, I have a new book coming out soon! (Eee gads! Let the nail-biting begin!) My eighth published novel, “Revealing Hope,” is the third and final book to the Stealing Light Trilogy and is now available for pre-order on all e-book platforms! (Can I get a woot woot?!) The big release day is January 28th. The writing process for everyone is different, but I’m pretty sure the anxiety that goes along with it is pretty much the same. When I started writing this trilogy, I never saw three books coming, let alone this one in particular. At first, I thought “Stealing Light” was going to be a stand-alone novel, but then I wrote one sentence in the last chapter, and BAM, I knew there had to be a sequel. As soon as “Stealing Light” was released, I had already started writing the first draft of its follow-up book, “Chasing Darkness.” Sometime during the process of writing, I knew it would have to be a trilogy, because certain things needed to be resolved, not only for my own sanity but for my readers. However, at that time, most of this final piece of the story was a mystery even to me. When I started writing “Revealing Hope,” the first several chapters poured out of me and then I stepped away from it for quite some time. Months actually. As the characters slowly exposed their path to me, this story developed in a way that I never imagined. Writing “The End” to any book is always hard for me, and even more so when it completes a series. The end for this trilogy is now dangerously near. (Gulp. Someone, hold me?) We writers question ourselves non-stop, especially as release day looms. Did I do enough? Is it good enough? Did I do the characters and their story justice? Will the fans like it? Will they hate it? Will they be disappointed? My first draft is where I don’t question myself so much. I just let the creativity flow and let the story tell itself. Then, I hand it off to my trusted beta readers. They give me imperative feedback to make the story better. The second draft is where the really hard work comes in. Plot flow and plot holes get addressed and fixed. Scenes get re-written, more details are added (or, in some cases, removed.) Minor grammar revisions take place. Once this is done and reviewed, I run the manuscript through Grammarly (a handy-dandy grammar program), and blech, more revisions. After another read-through, I send this third draft to my Editor. She does line-by-line edits and, boy, does my manuscript bleed! Final edits are usually the most torturous for me. For some reason, doing 3 pages of edits feels like a hundred. Once these final edits are completed, I get the book formatted for online readers and ship out several Advanced Reader Copies (ARCs). ARCs get sent to bloggers and reviewers so that any last-minute errors can be fixed before it’s released, but, more importantly, so that reviews can get posted on release day! When these ARCs go out, the nerves set in. Hang on, while I go throw up in the other room… Ha. But eventually, all artists need to let their work go. You can keep revising, rewriting, adding, and changing things, but at some point, you just have to call it done and say “That’s a wrap.” otherwise, you’ll never finish a project. Yes, it’s hard. Yes, it’s scary (terrifying, actually). Yes, you’ll doubt yourself. But, I’m going to quote a dear friend and colleague of mine, Danielle Bannister, who recently wrote something about just this in one of her blogs, “One thing that does remain the same, even though it took me years to learn, was to trust my muse. Even if what was being whispered to me made NO sense to what I was just writing, I listen. ... Thankfully, I have been rewarded with my eighth novel in 8 years, and (FINALLY) a completed paranormal suspense trilogy, that, fingers crossed, will take readers on a new and fantastic journey. Pre-order your copy today!
Amazon https://amzn.to/3adY9B iBooks https://apple.co/3afJqW7 Nook https://bit.ly/3abDT2X Smashwords https://bit.ly/36XX6mz Kobo https://bit.ly/30ma2Ac To check out Danielle Bannister’s books and blog: https://daniellebannister.wordpress.com/ Or, visit her at Amazon: https://amzn.to/2uRsMMs The What Is.11/19/2019 So. Many. Words. Just jumbled up inside of me, pushing and shoving to get out. But where to begin? Sigh. The struggle of a writer. Or any artist or performer really. We have these thoughts. These visions. These images. Ideas. Words. People. Scenes. Energy. They are jumbled up inside our head and sometimes we catch glimpses of them. Shadows, if you will. Then, sometimes… quite suddenly, they start pushing their way to the front and want to get out. It can be chaos. And poor me (us) the writer, the artist, (or whomever) … gets down to the painstaking craft of trying to unlock the door and release the “WHAT IS.” What I mean by the “WHAT IS,” is literally, “What is back there? What is going on? WHAT THE EFF IS ABOUT TO BE UNLEASHED?” It’s the WHAT IS that pushes -- or maybe compels is a more accurate word -- us to make us tell it’s story. Whether it’s through writing, art, music, dance, sports, whatever that WHAT IS is, it aches to escape and needs to get out. Like a horror film, the WHAT IS climbs and claws it’s way through our mind and body to get to the forefront. A thrilling and suspenseful, yet sometimes painful and torturous journey, that keeps us on edge and drives us forward to unleash it’s power. We, as writers/artists/athletes, simply open the door and become the conduit. And sometimes, some of us are brave enough to unleash our WHAT IS to the world. Let me tell you… it is a scary sonofabitch. But, It is a part of our being; a fire within ourselves that somehow moves through our fingers, feet, bodies, or voices. Regardless of the manner -- our bodies are the conduit for the creative force that is within. And sometimes, we do it justice. Other times? Notsomuch. We WANT to. Trust us. We really, really want to do it justice. But sometimes, it escapes us and the WHAT IS doesn’t fully come out, isn’t fully realized, or we simply don’t tell it right. But still. We give it to you. As terrified as we are… And the WHAT IS becomes IT. And IT becomes a part of us. Then… maybe… if we’re lucky…. In some way it becomes a part of you. Sometimes, YOU hate it. And we feel that hate. Ohhhhhhh we feel that hate so deeply. That’s what is so terrifying. But yet… the bravest of us… the ones that can’t quiet the WHAT IS keep going. Keep talking. Keep Writing. Drawing. Singing. Moving. Racing. Creating. For whatever reason, even through the pain, suspense, torture, tears, and fear, that spine-tingling, pulse-racing FEAR… We. Keep. Going. We do it because we must. We keep letting the WHAT IS come out. And we pray… and hope… and dream… each time… That you love and embrace our WHAT IS. AuthorJulie Cassar, Best Selling Archives
September 2023
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